


Sirius and remus black(awhhhh)

by orphan_account



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: I Will Go Down With This Ship, M/M, Moony/Padfoot, Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-06
Updated: 2016-04-17
Packaged: 2018-05-25 05:03:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,147
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6181345
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Starts mid 6th year and goes up until remus divorces Sirius because everyone thinks he killed lily, James and Peter - gonna make you laugh and cry sweeties</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Now, when it comes to Sirius black there is no secrets he just not the type of person who has them, but im sure to fucking God that he's hidding something cause he won't come within 100 meters of me no matter what. James just gives me a knowing and half sympathetic look and Peter just grunts in a dismeaningful way.

So when I go the note from James that Sirius wants to see us all I was bloody surprised to say the least. Even feeling like this is still went ,I may as well I thought to myself.

As I walk through the door into the marauders dorm I notice the awkward silence in the room. I walk over to the foot of my bed and plonk myself down leaning against my head rest.

"Finally Moony , come on pads get on with what you want to tell us!" Grunted james 

"Righttttttyyyy... now ... um before I say ought... no matter what will all still be friends ???"whispered sirius

"No we're gonna leave you to die of no humanine contact"I muttered 

"Very funny rem very funny, anyway I've got something important to tell you." Concluded Sirius 

"Get on with it then"shouted Peter 

Sirius sighed "I'm gay" he murmed 

"Never noticed you idiot I've known for years" said James with a laugh 

"Sirius mate we didn't need telling" came from Peter. 

"Remmie what's your view ???" Murmured Sirius 

I didn't answer. I needed time alone to think. I just stood up and Strod out the door through the commen room and out to the grounds . I needed to think. 

 

 


	2. Sirius it's ok

I was sat under my favourite tree. Just looking at the lake. Sirius had things so easy! He could just go out and say he's gay, and that's why I had to get out of there , Because EVEN though I'm as gay as can be i can't tell them all. Never. Not even pads or prongs. Only lily knoes and that's only because she figured it out in 4th year.

But no I'll never tell them, they know about my 'furry little problem' but this they shall never know. I'm Also not going to leave a note. I sigh, wondering who will find me. I pull the blade out of my bag and start making deep cuts anywhere I can.


	3. blood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh deary me what's happing to Moonie   
> ALSO  
> I really need support with this I've had no comments and I really want to hear what you guys think! Your the amazing lot who put up with my absolutely terrible organisation but I promise in 8 weeks when I'm on summer vacation it will be better (only every 2 weeks probley 

Sirius-  
I walked to our favourite tree I knew he would be there I just wanted to know what the hell was going through his head.   
I wanted to hug him tell him I loved him just to hold him and call that silly werewolf mine.  
But him feeling the same was such a tiny possibility. I still wanted to find him thou.  
James had offered, I declined he didn't need the hassle. Lily was running rings around him and his mum and dad where ridiculous ill.  
I was about 300 meters from the tree when I noticed the still body I called out  
"Remmie"I screamed   
Another 200 meters I can see the red blood flowing out of his arms on to the grass, the moonlight making it sparkle in a innocent harmless way.  
"Remmie"I whispered   
I was 10 meters away from him   
9 meters  
8 meters  
7 meters   
6 meters   
5 meters   
3 meters   
1 meter..  
He looks so Ill ..  
Gaunt and withdraw colourless face and his right hand clutching his potions knife and some parchment. I let out a small sob. His left arm was a massica of cuts and blood. I picked him up, not an easy task as I'm a seeker. I need to get him to help to anyone who could help him. I needed him to breath it was that simple no matter what I needed him. Lily needed him. James needed him. Peter needed him. The wolf needed him. Our sheer good luck needs him. 

It was this moment that I loved him the most. More then anything in the world. Everything was a blure I was running flat out he needed madem pomfry or st.mungos. He looked so slim and ill it was killing me inside, more then it had done when mother threw me out and reg decided to be their doll. I knew I was screaming for help. I didn't know what else to do. I was ment to be the protector of the group. James was the leader.  
Remus was the planner and Peter was the peace keeper. We couldn't lose him. Never he is mine.  
And I want to be his.

I make it to the hospital wing pomfry comes rushing out. Paleling at the bloody body in my armes. I conceal a small sob. Pomphry leads me in to a small room and instructs me to place remus there and then leave. I couldn't do the latter.

I lay my head on the arm rest of the chair and drift in to a nightmare filled dream.

I awoke to the sounds of Minnie and Dumbledore their hush whispers confusing me slightly.  
"Ahhh Mr black how was your sleep"came from minnies mouth  
"Shit" was my short reply  
"Language pads" came a small, forced voice.  
"Mooney..."


	4. loving remus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 2 chapters in one day wow I'm spoiling you lot! Still need your support it would mean the world

Previously...  
"Mooney.."

 

Remus-  
"Pads why? How did? What happened? After what I did? Where are prongs and wormie? And flower?" I whispered   
"Mr potter, miss Evans and Mr Pettigrew are waiting in my office as I am not allowing any student in these four walls eside from you and Mr black here. Who I presume you have a more then platonic relationship with if you know my meaning"  
Minnie, sorry professor mcgonnagoll looked like she was struggling to keep a smug, I told you so face back by turning away from us.  
"Ahhh, as amusing as I am miniva we must leave these two lovers to solve there differences in peace."  
With that they swept out of the room.  
Sirius giggled, like a ultimate girl may I say, and turned to look at me   
"Remmie you have to understand I.." Sirius started.  
"No pads I've got some thing to say as well, I'm gay... I've know since 3rd year I've just been waiting for the right time and it never seemed to come and when just came out and so easily Said it I was so hurt... because I love you sirius Orion black and no matter..."  
I only stopped talking because sirius smashed his lips to mine and I let my mouth down the thinking for me.

After a about 5 minutes our complete and utter snogging session stopped and we rested our foreheads against the others  
"Be mine Remmie.."muttered sirius   
"Forever" I murmured and boy did I mean it.

I laced my fingers in to his silky black hair and looked in to the dark black orbs in his eyes , pressed my lips to his and snogged him senseless.

He was my boyfriend after all.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry about this chapter it broke my heart writing this. I just need him outside for the next chapter~ so very sorry 


End file.
